Tess Barron
- Dec 29, 2023
- 10 min read

Romance Writing 101 Q&A: Your Top Questions Answered

Fiction Editor Answers Your Top Romance Writing Questions

Getting started in romance fiction can, at first, seem easy. But most writers figure out pretty quickly that just because lots of people are doing it doesn't mean they are doing it well or that it's a simple task.

Whether you are a budding writer looking to dive into the world of love stories or a seasoned author aiming to refine your craft, the path to creating captivating romance is paved with questions and nuances.

In this comprehensive guide, I aim to unravel the intricacies of romance writing from an experienced fiction editor's perspective.

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I'll address the queries that often linger in the minds of storytellers and put them conveniently in one place for you.

From the foundational elements that constitute a good romance to the nuanced techniques that breathe life into a love story, we will explore the art and science of crafting engaging narratives that touch readers in their hearts and no-no zones.

…sorry. I'm in one of those moods again.

Here is a breakdown of today's Q&A so you can navigate to what you need to know:

Foundations of Romance Writing

How do you write a good romance?

Crafting a compelling romance involves finding a perfect blend of authentic emotions and well-developed characters.

Begin by establishing relatable protagonists with depth and complexity. No cardboard people!

After you have created great and appealing characters, build tension through engaging dialogue between them and shared experiences. Allow their relationship to evolve organically.

Balance moments of conflict and resolution to maintain reader interest.

Infuse your narrative with palpable emotions, drawing readers into the character's journey.

A good romance captivates by evoking a genuine connection and resonating with the universal themes of love and longing.

What is the classic romance formula?

The classic romance formula follows a trajectory of meeting, conflict, resolution, and happily ever after (HEA).

It typically begins with introducing protagonists, a gradual build of romantic tension, a central conflict threatening their relationship, and ultimately, a satisfying resolution leading to a committed union.

The enduring appeal of romance lies in the emotional journey, ensuring readers experience the highs and lows of love while culminating in a fulfilling and optimistic conclusion.

Rooftop dancing romantic - Image made with Leonardo.ai — Image made with Leonardo.ai

Is writing romance hard?

Writing romance comes with challenges, but whether it's perceived as hard varies from author to author.

Crafting authentic relationships and navigating emotional nuances require skill.

Balancing originality with genre expectations can be demanding, yet the genre's broad appeal allows for creativity.

Success often lies in understanding your audience, mastering the art of connection, and embracing the complexities of love. While challenging, many find the process immensely rewarding.

Romance Writing 101 Q&A - techniques and style

Techniques and Styles

What are the rules for romance novels?

While there are no hard and fast rules for writing, period, there are some things that you will want to consider putting on the list of things you need to nail if you're going to increase your chances of success in the romance genre.

Compelling characters who are well-developed and relatable.
Emotional depth that evokes genuine emotions throughout the entire novel.
Romantic development where you allow relationships to evolve organically and believably.
Tension and conflict that keep readers guessing and engaged
A satisfying resolution that ties up all loose ends and feels earned, whether happy or bittersweet.
Authenticity in capturing real feeling moments of love, conflict, and growth within a relationship.

What is a slow-burn romance?

A slow-burn romance is characterized by a gradual and prolonged development of the romantic relationship between characters.

Unlike quick, intense connections, a slow burn allows emotions to simmer and deepen over time. The narrative unfolds at a measured pace, building tension and anticipation.

This type of romance prioritizes emotional connection, emphasizing the journey toward love rather than swift, immediate gratification. The deliberate pacing creates a satisfying and realistic bond between the characters.

Romantic walk on the beach - Image made with Leonardo.ai — Image made with Leonardo.ai

What should you avoid in a romance novel? What not to do when writing romance?

Avoid common pitfalls in romance writing by steering clear of these missteps:

Clichés: Overuse of stereotypical romantic tropes can diminish originality.
Forced Conflict: Create authentic conflicts rather than contrived drama.
Lack of Chemistry: Ensure characters have genuine and believable connections.
One-Dimensional Characters: Develop well-rounded, relatable protagonists.
Rushing Relationships: Allow relationships to evolve organically without rushing.
Overly Predictable Plot: Include unexpected twists to maintain reader interest.
Neglecting Emotional Depth: Balance physical and emotional aspects for depth.
Ignoring Character Growth: Characters should evolve throughout the narrative.

I have written a guide on the worst and most common romance writing mistakes I see regularly as a fiction editor that you can read here.

Crafting Romance

How do you write an intimate scene?

Crafting an intimate scene requires sensuality, purpose, and a light touch.

Follow these steps:

Character Emotional State: Ensure characters' emotions align with the scene.
Buildup of Tension: Create anticipation through dialogue and actions.
Setting Atmosphere: Choose a fitting and intimate setting.
Sensual Descriptions: Use evocative language for physical sensations.
Character Perspectives: Shift perspectives for a fuller experience.
Emotional Depth: Infuse the scene with emotional resonance.
Character Agency: Allow both characters to actively participate.
Aftercare: Consider the emotional aftermath for realistic portrayals.
Reader Imagination: Strike a balance, leaving room for reader interpretation.

For an in-depth look at this topic, read my guide on crafting satisfying love scenes that resonate with readers.

Playful couple making a mess - Image made with Leonardo.ai — Image made with Leonardo.ai

How do you structure romance?

Again, there are no actual rules here, but I have a general guide for you. I've organized it for you into the most common 3-act framework for narrative fiction:

Act 1: Setting the Stage

Introduction of Characters: Introduce protagonists, establishing their personalities and backgrounds.

Establishing Normalcy: Present the characters in their everyday lives, allowing readers to connect.

Act 2: Building Tension and Conflict

Inciting Incident: Introduce a disruption to the characters' lives, sparking tension.

Building Romantic Tension: Develop the connection between characters, creating anticipation.

Central Conflict: Introduce a significant obstacle or conflict that challenges the budding relationship.

Act 3: Climax and Resolution

Climax: Place a pivotal moment that tests the relationship, leading to resolution.

Resolution: Resolve the central conflict, providing a satisfying conclusion or setting the stage for further development.

Emotional Arc: Ensure characters experience growth and emotional development.

Conclusion: Conclude the narrative with a firm resolution, often culminating in a happily ever after (or not, if you're not interested in that sort of thing. Though, be careful that your ending still satisfies even if your couple doesn't get to live their HEA). Offer a glimpse into the characters' future for added closure.

Hopefully, that helps you better understand where to place plot points and progress your story.

What is the best tense to write romance in?

The choice of tense in romance writing largely depends on the author's stylistic preference and the desired narrative effect.

Present tense can create immediacy and intensify emotions, immersing readers in the unfolding moments of the relationship. On the other hand, past tense allows for reflection and a more traditional storytelling approach.

Really, the best tense is the one that complements the tone and atmosphere you wish to convey in your romance novel.

Couple waking up together the morning after - Image made with Leonardo.ai — Image made with Leonardo.ai

How to write romance without cringe?

Writing romance that doesn't leave readers cringing requires a delicate balance of authenticity and subtlety.

Focus on these things:

Genuine Emotion: Portray authentic emotions rather than relying on clichéd expressions.
Character Development: Craft well-rounded characters with relatable qualities.
Subtle Gestures: Show love through subtle actions and gestures, avoiding overly dramatic scenes. (One or two at the climax or pivotal moments are usually alright).
Avoiding Stereotypes: Steer clear of stereotypical romantic tropes; strive for originality.
Natural Dialogue: Write dialogue that feels natural and reflective of real-life conversations and keeps the narrative moving.
Sensual, Not Graphic: If including intimate scenes, emphasize sensuality over explicit details.
Avoid the Thesaurus: When describing body parts, it's best not to get too creative. Out-of-place terms or silly jargon will rip your reader from the story.
Reader Empathy: Make characters relatable, allowing readers to empathize with their experiences.
Humor and Wit: Infuse humor and wit to lighten moments and add authenticity. Give the prose personality.
Conflict Resolution: Resolve conflicts realistically and satisfactorily.
Reader Connection: Consider your readership and what will resonate with them emotionally.

You will be much less likely to turn off your readers by checking those aspects of the story.

Specialized Subgenres

What is second chance romance?

Second-chance romance revolves around rekindling a past love that was previously lost or unfulfilled.

The narrative typically explores characters who get another opportunity at love after a period of separation or adversity. Themes of growth, forgiveness, and overcoming past obstacles are common.

This subgenre often delves into the complexities of navigating past hurts and rebuilding trust, offering a heartfelt exploration of love's resilience and the possibility of finding happiness after initial setbacks.

Head to my complete guide here for more information on this and other popular romance subgenres.

What is forced proximity romance?

Forced proximity romance centers on characters who find themselves in close physical proximity due to circumstances beyond their control. They are in a relational crucible (link)—a technique that increases tension and forces characters toward their breaking points.

Whether stranded together, working in confined spaces, or facing shared challenges, the forced closeness creates opportunities for emotional intimacy and romantic development.

This technique thrives on the tension and chemistry that arise from the characters being thrust together, allowing the narrative to explore how their connection evolves in the face of external pressures and constraints.

couple sharing a cake - Image made with Leonardo.ai

What is the meaning of dark romance?

Dark romance is a subgenre that explores intense and often taboo themes within romantic relationships. It delves into complex, sometimes morally ambiguous situations, incorporating elements of danger, suspense, or even the supernatural.

Themes may include obsessions, power imbalances, or characters with dark pasts.

Despite the darker elements, the genre still maintains a central focus on the romantic connection, offering a unique and emotionally charged storytelling experience that challenges traditional notions of love and relationships.

What are romance tropes?

Romance tropes are recurring themes, plot devices, or character archetypes commonly used in the genre. While some may be seen as clichés, they provide a familiar framework that resonates with readers.

Examples include:

Enemies to Lovers: Characters start as adversaries and develop romantic feelings.
Friends to Lovers: A friendship evolves into a romantic relationship.
Fake Relationships: When characters pretend to be in a relationship, leading to genuine feelings.
Forbidden Love: Love faces societal or situational obstacles.
Opposites Attract: Characters with contrasting personalities or backgrounds fall in love.
Alpha Hero: Dominant and strong male protagonists.
Strong Heroine: Independent and resilient female protagonists.
Love Triangle: Three characters entangled in romantic dynamics.
Misunderstandings: Conflict arises from characters misinterpreting each other.

You can use tropes like these as a foundation, then add your own twists to create fresh and engaging stories while providing the familiarity that romance readers have come to expect.

Tropes are not all bad. They raise their heads again and again for a reason—because they are relatable in many ways to many people. But that doesn't mean we don't bore of reading the same story over and over.

Strive to do something interesting with them if you are using them.

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Connecting with Readers

How do you build tension in romance writing?

Building tension in romance writing is crucial for keeping readers engaged. Consider these techniques:

Slow Burn: Gradually develop the romantic relationship over time.
Teasing Dialogue: Use suggestive or ambiguous dialogue to create intrigue.
Unresolved Conflicts: Introduce conflicts that keep characters apart or create emotional distance.
Physical Proximity: Play with the characters' proximity, building anticipation through nearness.
Foreshadowing: Hint at future developments to create suspense.
Secrets and Revelations: Uncover hidden truths to add complexity and tension.
External and Internal Obstacles: Introduce external challenges that impact the relationship and internal challenges characters must overcome to find love.
Emotional Turmoil: Explore characters' struggles and conflicting emotions.
Interrupted Moments: Disrupt potentially intimate moments to prolong the buildup.
Ambiguity: Leave certain outcomes open-ended to sustain the tension between scenes.

Meet cute at a bookstore romance writing - Image made with Leonardo.ai — Image made with Leonardo.ai

How do you write a falling-in-love scene?

Crafting a compelling falling-in-love scene requires a delicate touch, as these are such important moments in the narrative.

Here are some steps you might want to take:

Establish Connection: Show characters connecting on a personal level.
Shared Moments: Create memorable shared experiences that deepen the bond.
Subtle Gestures: Infuse the scene with meaningful, subtle gestures that convey affection.
Build Tension: Gradually intensify characters' emotional and physical tension (see above).
Vulnerability: Allow characters to reveal vulnerabilities, fostering a sense of intimacy.
Sensory Details: Engage the senses with descriptive details to enhance the scene.
Internal Monologue: Explore characters' thoughts and feelings as they fall in love.
Authentic Dialogue: Craft genuine and heartfelt dialogue that reflects evolving emotions.
Setting Atmosphere: Choose a setting that enhances the romantic mood.
Resolution: Conclude the scene with a moment of realization or mutual acknowledgment.

What is the average age of romance readers?

The average age of romance readers can vary, but surveys and studies suggest that a significant portion of the audience falls between 30 and 54.

Though this makes me wonder why so many writers choose to write YA romance, I'll admit the genre has a broad readership spanning various age groups.

Young adults, as well as older readers, also contribute to the diverse demographic of romance enthusiasts.

The genre's widespread appeal across age brackets highlights its ability to connect with readers of different life stages and experiences.

Just make it clear who your story is for from the outset.

Don't try to sell graphic sex to kids, got it?

Date at a carnival - Image made with Leonardo.ai — Image made with Leonardo.ai

What are some good themes for a romance story?

Several captivating themes can enrich a romance story. Here are some common ones:

Redemption: Characters overcoming past mistakes or traumas to find love and healing.
Love Conquers All: Exploring love that must overcome challenges such as cultural differences or illness.
Identity Discovery: Characters find love while discovering their true selves.
Forbidden Love: Finding love that goes against expectations and society, often involving deeper themes of freedom.

Choosing a theme that resonates with your story and characters can add depth and resonance to your romance narrative and is one of the most integral decisions you will make for your story.

Click here to learn more about incorporating theme and symbolism into your romance.

Final Words

Well, I'm finally out of questions to answer.

If you think of another one, please ask in the comment section, and we will add to this post there.

But I think, for the most part, we have explored many nuances within romance writing. And if I had to leave you with one final message, one thing to take away from this article (though I hope you take away more than that), it would be that the key to romance really is an authentic connection.

Everything you do in this genre needs to be focused on evoking those genuine feelings in your reader to really bypass their heads and capture their hearts with a firm grip.

So, storytellers, that's it for today. I hope your future love stories are filled with unforgettable characters, palpable sexual tension, and, above all, emotion that resonates with readers' hearts.

Keep writing!